Congratulations! You have been randomly selected to attend: DOG DAY (improv). CORDS (acapella). DSTYLE (freestyle rap). SHOW TONIGHT 9PM ROCKEFELLER CENTER 002 We hope you take this user test seriously and please follow all the instructions to the best of your ability: 1. Acquire a map 2. Locate the building uncommonly referred to as "Rockefeller center" on your map 3. Come on, you got admitted to Dartmouth, you can read a map 4. After turning your map right side up actually locate the building 5. Find your closest 68 friends and go to the location you just found on the map 6. Question the existence of the Lizard Elite 7. Feel insecure if you show up with less than 68 people because you want to show that you have 68 close friends by day 9 of your Dartmouth experience 8. Absorb at least 10 new friends while walking to Rocky 9. Realize there are subtle signs of the Lizard Elite everywhere 10. Walk into Rocky and down the stairs with your now 78 closest friends 11. Find room 002 but don't enter yet because Joe has to pee and he wants everyone to wait for him 12. Once Joe has finished peeing (but that honestly took a really long time was he actually pooping and didn't want to say?) enter Rocky 002 13. Join the lizard elite 14. Sit down in Rocky 002 and prepare for the most bodacious experience of your life 15. Enjoy the pure ecstasy, enlightenment, drama, and thrill of watching Dog Day, the Cords, and Dstyle deliver the performance of a lifetime Congratulations! You have successfully completed this user test. Keep a look out for more emails from the Lizard Elite in the future. Remember to check your junk inbox! see you soon my bretheren