Esteemed members of Cabin and Trail,

Tomorrow night during meetings we shall determine the Morals and Immorals
Committee Chairs for this year! You may have seen some pieces of wood lying
around in the basement with these titles inscribed upon them and that is
because this is a long standing CnT tradition. So what does TOYCN stand for and
how are these chairs determined?

TOYCN stands for Take Off Your Clothes Night which consists of two different
competitions to test your moral fiber, with the winner of each becoming the new
chair of a committee.

TOYCN begins at the start of regular meetings and you must be on time to
participate. Every time I bang the giant mallet upon the floor you must remove
one article of clothing until you are down to your final layer (or you prefer
not to remove anymore, your choice- and people have also removed their final
layers in the past. TOYCN is certainly not a censored event.) Note: you may
also come simply to observe, participation is by no means mandatory.

Morals Committee Chair: This position is for the most morally upstanding member
of CnT which is obviously the person wearing the most layers at TOYCN. Note:
there is a fairly loose definition of "layer," but I will rule on this matter
on a case by case basis. (a t-shirt counts as 1 layer but so does a sock.
Believe it or not, a hair tie does not count as a layer). I suggest bringing a
large duffle bag to throw your clothes in after taking them off. Running for
this position requires that you refold all of your clothes after the event.
Perfect if you haven't done laundry in a while. Morals Committee Chair
responsibilities include maintaining the moral nature of CnT meetings, holding
trials for any particularly egregious cases, and catching all "that's what she
said" jokes. If you really want to hold this position, you should wear so many
layers that you can no longer clap your hands together and you need someone to
roll you into the meeting room because you can no longer walk. This takes
dedication folks.

Immorals Committee Chair: This position is for the least morally upstanding
member of Cnt which will be the person wearing the least moral final layer
tomorrow. This will be determined using my applause-o-meter as you applaud for
your favorite contestant. To give you an idea of some final layers, the current
chair is Alan Keegan who wore two pieces of a tree cookie from woodsman's
practice that he routed and painted with some beautiful TOYCN artwork. Other
finalists wore newspaper underwear, a stuffed animal snake, a tiny playground
sign, and three tiny magazine pictures of Heath Ledger. You need to be willing
to put yourself out there for this event. Chair responsibilities include acting
as spokesperson for the defendant in all Morals Committee trials and
encouraging acts of immorality during CnT events.

NOTE: you can compete for both of these positions at the same time! While
extremely difficult it is possible to win both titles at the same time.

I encourage you to compete for these prestigious positions tomorrow night! This
is usually a well-attended and exciting evening for Chubbers.

Blitz me with any questions. Let's keep it clean out there!

Your Morals Committee Chair,
Gerben